NO RE-ENTRY BEYOND THIS POINT
But for me, those words had a double meaning.
Yes, they meant something in the Airport as a technical instruction. But at the same time, as I returned to my home city from 4 months in Europe, it also meant I couldn't go back to Austria. My experience there was over, and I needed to move forward.
I'd be lying if I said that it took me a while to realize this. Actually, I saw the sign and it hit me like a ton of bricks immediately. There's no turning back. My semester in Austria is over. I'm back home, and all that has become familiar over the last 4 months is no longer normal.
everything is changing
Four months after I returned from Crossroads, I wrote a long blog post about my experience over the summer. I said that thinking about it constantly wasn't healthy, and that I couldn't live in the past. Instead, I needed to learn to take those experiences and learn from them, and then move on while holding those lessons in my heart.
The exact same lesson was applicable on May 6 when I walked through those doors to find my parents. I reminded myself for about the 628th time that it's over. I'm done. But it didn't make it any easier.
Today, I can say I'm at a much better place than I was 2 weeks after Crossroads. (Thank God for that- I don't think I could go through that detachment process again!) But I still battle the thoughts of wanting to be back in the Nook at the Kartause. But ya know what? That's not where I'm supposed to be right now.
My focus is on the here and now. I will live in the present.
-St. Elizabeth Ann Seton